Posts

Showing posts from 2015

The New Normal

Up to this point, I  have failed miserably at keeping up with this blog. I could throw out some shade and recount all the reasons why I haven't written, but in all reality, it doesn't matter. What matters is that I'm here, posting now. About the new normal...

Recently, I was asked to briefly describe the first 6 years of my life. I simply said happy. My mom didn't work, we spent most of our time with my mom's parents. My dad worked all the time, but was always around for important things. We vacationed, had family dinners with my aunt and uncle, BBQ's in my grandpa's garden-style backyard. By all accounts, my childhood was the epitome of "normal."

Merriam-Webster dictionary defines NORMAL as: usual or ordinary : not strange.

Yes, life was usual and ordinary. At least for me. At least based on made-for-TV-movies...

Then, it occurred to me, that might have been "normal" for our family, but it wasn't really "normal" by societa…

62 Days of 30: Day 33: Why I Hate The Color Pink

I hate the color pink. There. I said it.

But really, it's not a secret. Even looking around my office, there is nothing pink. Not even a pen. I may own 1 or 2 articles of clothing that are pink, and chances are, I didn't pick them out myself.

Another admission? When I was pregnant, I told my sister she wouldn't get to go anywhere near my child if I was having a girl and she decided to throw me a baby shower with ANYTHING pink.

The fact of the matter is that the color itself, is simply, unpleasing to my eye. As a graphic designer, I break down colors into CMYK and RGB. What does that mean? CMYK is the 4-color process that is used to display colors for print. RGB is the the 3-color process that is used to display colors on electronics, ie: computer monitor, television, smartphone, etc. These colors are represented by a numerical value. I could go into a lot more detail, but, I understand that all this is relatively uninteresting for most of you.

Back to the topic at hand. Fo…

62 Days of 30: Day 17/Day 32: If Variety Is The Spice Of Life...

Day 17/Day 32... If variety is the spice of life, then it's no wonder I am bored as shit.

I started this topic over 2 weeks ago. And I'll be honest, I was seriously bored, and just feeling overwhelmed with things, and life in general. I was sick, well, I'm still sick. Quite frankly, I have bronchitis. I also have Asthma. I also was fearful I was going to get pneumonia. I honestly had this blog in the back of my mind, but I just couldn't get my shit together to write anything more than the first line.

But I'd be lying if I said, last night, in a cough medicine with codeine fog, I didn't lay in bed and write out several topic which I could cover on this blog. And honestly, the first thing I thought of made me laugh so hard I had to get out of bed because I couldn't stop coughing.

Various topics include:
Why I Hate The Color Pink
I Ate A Piece Of Pizza
I Should Be A Professional Crab Picker
A Snowboard To The Chest
I Think I Discovered A New Disorder
www.Lauren…

62 Days of 30: Day 8-ish: Stupid Excitement! Plus, Blessings...

Image
So, I realized something. It is relatively unrealistic for me to post on the weekends. I have several reasons, most notably, the computer I use at home is a little old lady, and she doesn't really like to be used anymore. Additionally, I don't have a lot of time on the weekends. So Monday's will just be a wrap up. UNLESS I do something spectacular and can simply post a lovely picture from my phone. However, there was really nothing particularly spectacular about this weekend.

And now, on to Stupid Excitement!

When you continually tell yourself you "can't" have something, or that you're "choosing not to eat it", it gets a little old. There are a lot of things I miss while participating in the Whole30(62), the most glaring, however, are: butter, ranch dressing, peanut butter and mayonnaise.

Welp, it looks like I got stupid excited when I made my very own mayonnaise, and then took some of that and made my very own ranch dressing! All of which is co…

62 Days of 30: Day 4/5: I Suck at Life...

Image
I know this isn't Day 4, I know this is Day 5. And for that, I apologize.

Like the title says, I suck at life. But I'm wicked cool.

I have a small, brief, excuse as to why I didn't post yesterday. I was extraordinarily busy. And really, I mean it. I was so busy I was barely able to finish all my work before I had to leave for a special event.

Special event, you say? What's so more special than posting on this fantastic blog? Well, I'll freakin' tell you! Wait, no, I'll freakin' SHOW YOU!



Ain't no thang, you know. I just watched Eric Church do a soundcheck with his band yesterday afternoon. You know, just another day at the office, really...

ARE YOU FREAKIN' KIDDING ME?! I watched freakin' ERIC CHURCH soundcheck like, 10 feet from me! It was probably one of the coolest things I've ever experienced. 


And by the way, you wanna know who else is wicked cool? The two guys that escorted me to the event. Just sayin'!
If you ever get a chance…

62 Days of 30: Day 3: Woman Crush Wednesday

Image
Today, is Wednesday. It's also Day 3 of the Whole62, and Day 3 of 62 Days of 30. And, apparently, on forums like Instagram, it is a popular day to use the hashtags: #womancrushwednesday and #wcw.

So, for the first time in, well, ever, I'm going to participate in #WCW and actually use the hashtag appropriately, rather than mockingly.

Today's Woman Crush Wednesday is my big sister, Colleen!

Before I begin singing her praises, you need to know something. We are nothing alike. Really, truly, I mean NOTHING alike. We are polar opposites. If you met us separately, and didn't know we were related, you would never make the connection. Ever. We don't look alike, we don't have the same interests, one of us can't dance while the other can, and one of us is so uncoordinated, while the other can, in fact, walk and chew gum at the same time. But, we are sisters. And today, she is my Woman Crush.

And really, there's not a whole lot I can say about her, other than the …

62 Days of 30 - Day 2: The Whole(30) Enchilada

Day 2: The Whole(30) Enchilada.

Well, not really. This isn't even about Enchiladas. I'm sorry if I got your hopes up. Maybe, at some point, when I don't want to kill everything (I'll explain), I'll share Momma Lynn's recipe for her famous (in our family) Italian-Style Enchiladas.

So here it is, the Whole30. Basically, it means, I'm crazy. Haha!

In the simplest of terms, the Whole30 is a way to reset your digestive system back to, pretty much, birth. It's a fantastically ridiculous program where basically, you don't eat anything except natural meat, veggies, and fruit.

That means, for 30 days, you completely eliminate: preservatives of any kind, added sugar (real or artificial), grains, carbs, starch (some is allowed in the form of yams and white potatoes), legumes (snap peas and green beans are allowed, but did you know peanuts are legumes?!), alcohol, dairy, and soy. Which, again, pretty much leaves you with meat, veggies, and fruit. With all this …

62 Days Of....

Image
62 Days of What? Well, 62 days of clean eating, for starters. 62 days of zero preservatives, alcohol, added sugar, starch, carbs, legumes, dairy, and most of all, 62 days of life.

In the next 62 days (why 62? I'll cover that shortly), I will cover a variety of topics. It's my goal to post everyday. That's right. I said it. EVERYDAY. So what will you get in the next 62 days, dear reader? You'll get recipes, anecdotes, fun posts about things I love, hilarious posts about things I loathe, and maybe, when it's all over, you'll be inspired. Inspired to eat clean, to come up with your own recipes, to laugh at your own stupidity, to laugh at my own stupidity, to love your family unconditionally, and to celebrate everything. All the time. Everyday.

Now, Why 62? Well, as I'm sure my birthday twin can understand, there are just 62 days till April 5, 2015. And what happens on April 5, 2015? I'll turn 30. Thirty. Trenta. Treinta. Trente. Trinta. Dertig. By the way,…

Curves Ahead...

The following post was written on January 12, 2015, between 4:05 and 4:57pm.

I acknowledge that this was written over 2 weeks ago.

I cannot, will not, and do not apologize for its tardiness. It took me a long while to want to post because, well, this is a difficult topic for me.

Now, you're probably wondering why it is titled "Curves Ahead..." Because, that's what it is... The biggest curve I've ever faced, in my entire life, up to this point...

-------------------------------------------------------
It's been 2015 - "The New Year" - for nearly 2 weeks.

I haven't written here or even addressed what I had hoped to become "loyal readers" in over 2 months. Well. There's a reason for that, I guess... I was waiting.

But what was I waiting for? Well, 6 days after my last blog post on November 10th, I discovered something... Something I would proceed to keep a secret for the next 6 weeks. Make no mistake, I was excited about this discover…